My Experience Being Fictionkin

A repost from my DreamWidth that I wanted to post here. Thought some of yall might have some thoughts on it.

Experiment 626
I don't feel like I have a "standard" experience with this 'type. It's been around since I was a very young child. I have never had a shift for it in any way, nor is it a very consistent presence in my mind. No noema, no memories. But I feel like I am looking at a mirror when I see him. It's uncanny, it's sometimes easier to recognize myself in him than it is in my own reflection (although usually that extreme is associated with high stress). I don't like engaging with fan art or other fan content because it's feels like others are manipulating me and my actions. Unless it's something that happens in the canon, I have a very strong aversion to it. People get me merch of him for me and while I appreciate it, it's akin to having my face plastered everywhere. Others who are massive fans of Stitch can be pretty off-putting, it feels like they are deeply invested in me and that's a very invasive feeling.

There are a handful of similarities between us. I enjoy being a bit weird, gross, and loud. It's fun! I also have an intense fear of drowning while simultaneously loving to surf!

The vast majority of the time, I can coexist and just let folks be. I have no desire to police anyone. Stitch is a very popular Disney character and the face of his franchise. I just have to distance myself from fandom spaces, as many fictionkin already do.

Personal Fiction
My personal fiction is a lot deeper. It's a chicken and the egg situation. Am I fictionfolk because I'm a gillman and needed an outlet, or am I a gillman because I became so absorbed in my fiction? That part doesn't really matter. What matters to me is how much this fiction impacts everything around me. It's where I go to relax, I can talk about it for hours. I know everything there is to know and I am still building. It will turn 10 years old this December. If you do not understand this fiction or at least its place in my life, I don't think you can really understand me as an individual. It's to the point where people who do not know about my nonhuman identity know about my connection to my fiction. When friends find my blog or question me, my first reply is "I've spent so long in [personal fiction] that I feel I belong there more than I do here" and it usually clears things up pretty quickly.

I do not have shifts for this one, but what I've created for it has absolutely solidified itself in my mind as noema. I can give myself phantom shifts if I want, but my natural shifts differ from it. I do have very very intense cravings and longings for it, and if I think too hard I will cry. I prefer calling myself fictionfolk in regards to my personal fiction. Not only would it simply not exist without me (making "kin" feel a bit odd, given that most other fictionkins are pieces of media that others may encounter, as opposed to this deeply private one), but I am the fiction in it's entirety. I am the ecosystem, the atmosphere, I am every single individual. It's a scale that I don't really think can be captured by the -kin suffix. -Folk isn't entirely there, but it is closer!

Eunice
This is where things get more into the traditional fictionkin experiences, from what I can tell. Eunice is a character I made spring of '23 and that I attached to very very strongly. I can get into her headspace pretty easily, which means that I generally have an absolute blast with worldbuilding and writing. She's very easy for me to work with. I'm sure anyone who follows my main tumblr blog is familiar with my feelings towards her.

In summer '24, I was very stressed. One of my outlets was Eunice. I was also in Spain. Eunice is from a fantasy setting inspired by 14th century Portugal and Spain. I went to a lot of old castles and medieval locations, and there were many times where I entered Eunice's mind unwillingly. I couldn't get out, either. Modern language and technology confused me, and the only thing I could think about were thoughts that she'd have in her fiction. It took me, usually, about 30-45 seconds to get myself out of it, but it happened at least once a day as I traversed the area.

Because I am not in Spain anymore, I don't get these shifts as often. They still happen, though, if I am exposed to specific images or places. Recently, a friend showed me photos they had taken during a trip to Rome. For a few seconds, I was Eunice again. Images that resemble medieval Iberia and that do not feature modern technology or imagery has the potential to trigger a shift for me. I don't come in contact with them very often, but it does definitely happen every so often! This is technically OCkin, and I could write it down on my list, but it happens so infrequently and has such little impact on my day-to-day life that it's not really worth it.

Sarah O'Brien
Shifts of O'Brien have happened to me only once. My partner and I had started watching Downton Abbey in spring of '25 and really got into it. I've seen a lot of it already in passing, as my parents love it, but this was the first time I've really been able to get into the show. I was also working crew for a play and running around doing errands for the stage manager. That was what really triggered it. While being attentive towards them, I fully became O'Brien for a few moments. While I lacked the accent, my speaking pattern changed and I had to stop myself from calling the stage manager "milady." That word does not have the same associations, these days...!

It happened a few times over the course of tech week, and hasn't happened since. It was the first and only time that I've had such a strong shift for a character that I didn't create, very interesting experience. I haven't spoken up about this experience yet, but it did absolutely happen. Very strange experience, for sure! I'm not totally sure why my brain picked O'Brien. I like her a lot, but she's not who I would have expected. Honestly, I would have put my money on becoming Mary or Anna before O'Brien. Hell, even Carson or Thomas seems more likely. But alas, it was O'Brien.