Hide background
READ THIS!

Welcome to the Otherkinphenomena forum.

You really have to follow these instructions! Instructions will update as you progress.

If you wish to post on, or access most of the content of our forum and our community, please click here to register first, then follow the instructions below. If you have already registered, please log in, in the above "Hello There, Guest!" box.

Thanks for understanding and see you around.



Post Reply 
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
so...I guess I am otherkin...
Chordal
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 452
Points: 2662.00
Contribution: tick tick tick 

Post: #1
so...I guess I am otherkin...
All right, so I've been doing some reading...to be honest, even the thought of writing about this has got my adrenaline going.

I recently received external confirmation that what has been going on with Bell and myself could be...not as good as I'd hoped. By that I mean, I'm considering the possibility that Bell could be a Neg (negative spirit being), as defined in Robert Bruce's way of thought, though the way that he assumes the reader knows what he means by "negative" could be...a hole in his discourse. Because I, for one, am not sure what he is contrasting "negative" against.

He does mention at the beginning of the book that, "Many lesser Negs...can appear to be demonic while not actually being true demons." (Bruce 17) As for the definition of "demon": "'Demon' is the common term used to describe the higher orders of non-human Negs. These are unlike other Negs in that they are far more ancient, intelligent, powerful, and evil." (Bruce 16)

So now I'm thinking...what is going on here?

From everything I've read so far, cross-referenced with what I know happened when I was young (age 11 on) and Bell was my "spirit friend"...it's possible that a lot of the bad stuff that's happened in my life (group harassment, fights with an energetically sensitive parent, my own depression and aggression at the same age, the development of Adrian as a 'dark side'...) could have been contributed to by spirit influences, while on the other hand relief from this (allowing Bell through my body which granted me temporary reprieve from my pain, Bell teaching me biofeedback to relieve my anxiety, Bell being my companion while I was lonely because people feared me, my falling in love with him, etc...) could have been seen as his taking advantage of the situation.

That is, could Bell have been both the cause and the relief of my problems? Crowd influence to pick on me would have been easy enough -- it's very easy for spirits to influence the actions of people who aren't thinking, especially those who are acting as part of a crowd (the latter of which, Bruce notes: "Crowds are easily influenced and controlled, and it is well known that crowd violence can be orchestrated by a few key agitators...Crowds will often do terrible things that no individual within the crowd would ever do alone." [Bruce 122])

And then there is the "merging" which began when I was in my late teens: "Some Negs seem to specialize in targeting children, attaching to and integrating with them." (Bruce 123)

I'm not going to write everything that tipped me off in this section of the book here, because for one thing it may be a copyright violation, for another thing there is just too much of it.

It seems that I may be partially integrated with a spirit who is at the least demonic (meaning "like a demon," not necessarily "a demon"). This could be the reason for my neutral/dark orientation spiritually; it could also be the reason Adrian is even here ("When [Negs begin integrating with a child's personality, they] begin forming the dark side of a child's personality." [Bruce 126]).

Then there is the idea that Bell seems to have revived Core, as far as we can tell -- and it may be because Core has "pure, good life energy" that Adrian does not...

This is not to mention...the other day I was reading something here which triggered off a visualization of something sucking (popping noise) between my clavicles. Eventually, after my attempting to repel this, a jet of energy shot out from there, for a very long distance, and formed into a large snake (rattlesnake) and started hissing, rattling, and snapping with fangs at whatever was messing with me. Once whatever it was, was driven off, the snake retracted into me and came to rest with its throat facing up, inside my own throat. I don't know whether to be glad I have a protector or disturbed that apparently my protector is carried within me.

*Then* there's the whole thing with the recent visualization (which I believe I posted about in the Magic forum) seeming to say that I may have a different energy-body structure than a normal human. *And* the huge black wings that I felt last night -- and saw clearly enough to be able to draw.

And all that to say WHAT THE HELL? Am I now essentially demonic, just in a much lesser way than to be a demon myself? Was I ever a normal human? After this life, am I going to go on with Bell to attach to another young person and integrate with them? Do I accept this or do I attempt to disentangle myself from Bell, if that could ever be possible now (12 years after the fact)?

And what is the difference between a good spirit and a bad one -- the good *can* do what the bad one *does*, but doesn't?

*sighs*

I'm keeping back some information...but I suppose I wanted to say that it seems that as long as the situation remains as it is, I am likely actually Otherkin...just not so in a way that I would have preferred...

I would like to talk about this. If I have left no opening for others to engage me on, tell me....
2011-06-26 22:16
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Acta non Verba
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 268
Points: 1450.00
Contribution: tick tick 

Post: #2
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
Who's Bell?
2011-06-26 22:43
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Rain
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 289
Points: 1495.00
Contribution: tick tick 

Post: #3
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
Huaha, interesting. It seems something unexpected has occurred.

Your story is similar to my own, though there appears to be differences in the finer details. Allow me to mention that my current state is in that the two beings are merged, unlike your own in which they are currently separate. For that, I believe I can shed some light on the subject.

Pronoun usage is... a bit difficult, so please bear with me.

I have experienced many troubles in my life, though I can safely say that "it" was not the cause of most of them, especially in regards to the mistreatment of others... at least directly. While it may be possible that someone may have gotten a "negative" feeling from me and responded accordingly, even though "it" desired me to release it and allow it control (which would have made it easier for it to forcibly integrate), it would not purposely instigate a dangerous situation, only capitalize on it.

As far as you and Bell merging completely, as long as you don't wish for it, it won't happen. My own un-merged situation was very uncomfortable, as it had forcefully integrated itself enough to be part of my... [can't find a word]... and yet my own resistance made it so the mixture was heterogeneous as opposed to homogeneous -- a circle composed of both black and white as opposed to a circle of gray. Though we were functioning off of the same source, our individuality was kept forcibly intact and it was... well, looking back at it now, as I am, it was painful.


Merging is... well, it's not altogether pleasant. Your very self is changed at the fundamental level at a slow, deliberate pace, and it's not impossible for you to lose the qualities you hold dear in the process simply as due course. Most important, however, is that the individuality that many take for granted simply won't exist anymore. There is no "his will" -- it is simply yours. It is far easier to reject the request of somebody else than to reject the desires yourself.

As for what to do with the situation -- just kill Bell. Simple. Easy. Effective. You'll lose a lot of who you are and you'll most likely become depressed and "broken". You'd have to live with the pain of knowing you made the decision and the incompleteness you'd most likely feel afterward (you mention you've already been merging). You'd have to live with that pain of sacrificing something dear to you for the sake of preserving your own life and identity as you know it.

You'll probably know what you're going to do just from reading the paragraph above. While I am unable to regret merging, I would say that killing "it" would have left "who I was" better off than I am now. My personal merging was a form of death in its own right.

Granted, Bell is not the same as "it". Take my experiences as you will.

~~~
2011-06-27 3:10
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Chordal
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 452
Points: 2662.00
Contribution: tick tick tick 

Post: #4
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
@ Acta non Verba:

Bell is someone who's been with me since I was about 11 years old. Our relationship began as his being an "imaginary friend" whose actions ended up being independent of my thought. When I met him, he said that he was someone (slightly older than myself at the time, male, Asian) who had been killed by the freeway that ran right next to my then-dwelling...

We would communicate 'telepathically', which is why I thought initially that he was an imaginary friend. At the time, I was going through some difficulty in school. It wasn't academic difficulty, it was social; I had a really hard time that year because I was an overachiever put into a classroom with a bunch of troublemaking kids and a teacher who was too weak to control them. So they basically ran the class, and the teacher, and he offered pretty much no protection to me that I could see. (I say this because I recall that his attitude and actions towards me would fall in line with the student ringleader's, at times.)

I should note that the ringleader of these kids lived not so far away from myself (let's say two doors down, in an arrangement that would not have prevented discarnate entry). I've hypothesized that perhaps Bell was a Neg attached to him (the ringleader) who migrated to me, but I don't have evidence of that other than circumstantial.

The clearest memory I have of that time is the ringleader's howling at me because he thought I should straighten my hair, and what seemed to be a majority of the boys falling in line with this and howling at me, at the same time. The thought that Bell was *his* Neg is simply because I'm suspecting that Bell might have been, where I couldn't sense or control him, puppeting this kid, who in turn was puppeting the majority of the boys. However, I have no proof for this but "qui bono?" ("who gains?") -- because that was definitely a traumatic event for me, which would have caused me to lean on Bell harder as a "spirit friend".

To my face, Bell wasn't like this. I also recall feeling that I did not have the right to experiment imaginatively with sexual fantasies towards others I knew (I was 11 at the time and had an unformed sexual identity), so the majority of that also got shifted over onto Bell, who later became more of a 'spirit lover.'

This also coincided, by the way, with having a "best friend" who was manipulative and probably being sexually abused at home, plus (I think) rumors going around that I was likely either lesbian or actually a boy -- and that's probably due to the closeness that I and this "friend" had at the time. I ended up leaving her later, because I came to the decision that being treated poorly was worse than not being treated at all.

At home, I'd been told since I was very young that I "might be called to be a shaman," which meant, essentially, that I knew to expect spirit contact. However, I wasn't told what to do, how to defend myself, or what could actually happen if spirit contact actually occurred.

The majority of the contact happened before I went to sleep (at that time) -- I recall staying up with an active mind for at least one to two hours a night, communicating with spirits and praying (to the "God" I then knew, which...I don't know what that was; it probably wasn't any of the same "Gods" I'd know later) and dealing with sexual or disturbing visualizations. The prayer was basically because I was afraid I'd go to Hell (could that have been someone else's thought?); the more psychic portion of this (scans, shields, telepathy, dealing with disturbing visualizations) was...stressful and meditative at the same time; it's a reason I avoided meditation for so long in adulthood. The association of stress with sleeping -- for a long time I only got 5 to 6 hours of sleep at night, in the high school years -- probably was the seed of my current sleep problems.

Anyway -- in high school, the spirit contact (mostly not disturbing at this time, though) would start happening as I was trying to do my homework, or being at school, or brushing my teeth; the last of which caused time loss (blackouts) of about 30 minutes at a gap, the first of which caused spontaneous visions which persisted like a phone ringing until I let the vision run its course; and at school -- I'd end up having a running dialogue in my head at the same time as I was listening to teachers (still got good grades <!-- sTongue --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_razz.gif" alt=":P" title="Razz" /><!-- sTongue -->), with certain times when I'd let Bell use my form. The latter happened because I had become depressed, due to life circumstances (having been abandoned by the group of "friends" I used to eat with at lunch, for no obvious reason) and didn't want to live; so Bell could come up through my form. I recall the thought from him, which roughly read something like, "at least you're alive." (As versus him.)

When I initially told a parent about Bell, probably sometime between the ages of 12 and 14, this parent basically went hysterical and demanded that I "stop talking to him!" which only, really, made me stop talking to them about him, which meant that I lacked practical support. That dynamic, Bruce also mentions.

There is something odd here that went on with Bell, which began early on.

In other threads on this site, I've mentioned a being I called Fiore. Fiore, I thought at the time, was like Bell's doppelganger. He would appear to be Bell, but he was...troublesome. In my mind I learned to put up a wall between who I knew as Bell and who I knew as Fiore, and separate them out. I thought at the time that Fiore was impersonating Bell (whose visible form I partially lifted from a character design in an old anime called "Haunted Junction"; he initially had none), and that anytime I saw that form, I'd have to shift to a different sense (feeling his energy) to tell if it was Bell or Fiore.

However...I was often too frightened to be able to use the ability, because I wanted so badly for him to be Bell and not Fiore, that I couldn't be impartial -- and I was scared of what would happen if Fiore knew that I knew that it was him. I wanted him to be "Bell," and I wanted him to act towards me in a safe manner. Which meant...I got scared a lot. ^_^;

What I'm thinking now is that Bell and Fiore could, in actuality, have been the same spirit...though I do realize that Fiore wasn't a real threat, and that Bell could have taken the form of Fiore to try and train me to use my clairsentience (given that Bell could change his energy signature?!?!).

The merger, or "fusion" as I called it in years past...that didn't happen until I was about 17. Bell had told me not to tell anyone about him (this preceded the "stop talking to him!" incident), though I'd been pushed into psychiatry because I was becoming increasingly depressed and aggressive (fighting at home). While I was in psychiatry, I talked about him. I was placed with a child psychiatrist whom I mentioned him to; she recommended an SSRI (antidepressant) which caused, essentially, all of the internal noise to stop. I have a feeling that she knew that this is what would happen, but hadn't notified me or gotten my consent (she has a reputation for playing mind games, I found out later)...anyhow. It was disturbing.

I used a lot of energy, concentration, focus, whatever you want to call it. I summoned Bell. Bell asked me if I wanted to be a shaman, I said yes. Fusion began then, though I was wary of the "forever" clause. I was told that if I wanted to, in the distant future (i.e. death, don't wish for it peoples) I could separate from him. I didn't see him for a long time after that, but it comforted me to know that he was with me. There's more stuff that happened after the silent period involving the coming-to-sentience of Blaze (Adrian's old codename), but this is long enough.

Pro-Bell information: <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink -->

I'm not sure if it was at the time of the merger, or another time...Bell let me know that he was a body-hopper; that he would seek out people significantly post-birth and join with them in order to retain what of himself he could -- as versus being reincarnated the normal way, in which what of himself he retained, he felt would be lost. This is why it shocked me so much to read that passage in Bruce -- either someone was listening in on me and told Bruce about my experience, or my experience is not...unique. (And all this time, I thought it was my mind making up disturbing stories...)

If it was Bell who told me about this...he wasn't lying to me, at least in that case. Bruce says that it's in the nature of Negs to lie and deceive. But Bell has also told me that he had a hand in my fights with a parent, because, he says, he wanted me. I'm not entirely sure what this means, yet. It was hard enough to ask the question, let alone get the answer. But he wanted to tell me.

I've also sensed that Bell would be uncomfortable being the only person in this body -- I'm not sure if that's a base-level discomfort, or if it's because I currently live with family, and this would lead to the "who are these people?" state, plus feeling unworthy of accepting care from them.

As a third mark for him, he's never threatened anyone I care for (or even anyone I haven't) -- which is a ground rule for me when dealing with spirit entities. Fiore was definitely more chaotic and frightening (I think I've called him 'deranged but not evil' before), but I didn't sense that even he was out to harm anyone, he just got a kick out of scaring them. Which is why I think he may have been a training mask...but looking back over the whole of this, I'm thinking that evidence for Fiore being Bell in disguise (ETA: for the purposes of training, at least) doesn't really make sense.

My question at core is whether I can trust Bell, which is what I'm dealing with now. I need to formulate questions to ask him, at the least. I need to get clear about who he actually is, and what his nature is. If he's a good or neutral spirit who is not forcibly earthbound, and who isn't going to meet major punishment for using a loophole in the normal rules of incarnation -- if he had no hand in my childhood troubles which coincided with his active period -- I have no problem being bonded to him. But if he was manipulating external events to increase his control over me? That's different...that is not someone I want to become.

And if I remain bonded to him...how much of a hand will I (Core?) have in who I am in the future? If we move forward and I and he become one, *can we* decide *not to* pursue this form of livelihood in the future, and still remain existent? If he is "negative", will my addition bring us more to the "positive" end?

Then there's the power issue...which could probably be its own thread (if we are powerful, is it because of him or because of me?), so I'll just leave the note that this arose in my mind, for now.
2011-06-27 4:59
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Acta non Verba
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 268
Points: 1450.00
Contribution: tick tick 

Post: #5
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
Oh, ok, I was worried you were referring to Bel.

<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bel_(mythology">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bel_(mythology</a><!-- m -->)
2011-06-28 0:10
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Chordal
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 452
Points: 2662.00
Contribution: tick tick tick 

Post: #6
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
Acta non Verba Wrote:Oh, ok, I was worried you were referring to Bel.

<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bel_(mythology">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bel_(mythology</a><!-- m -->)

XD
2011-06-28 5:48
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Chordal
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 452
Points: 2662.00
Contribution: tick tick tick 

Post: #7
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
Wow, one year after this posting, and I'm actually kind of surprised how things have changed. They haven't so much changed materially, but perceptually.

I still do have a strong "dark" side, but it generally only shows itself when I have to cope with things like institutionalized bigotry. And people who draw up in me, a strong feeling that I need to protect myself. That is, not so often, these days.

I still have to deal with the plurality, and that's really not easy, especially as I've not dealt with plural community writ large for quite a while (it wasn't, on the whole, conducive to my own health). But I have gotten a lot of internal support in attempting to revive "Core." The thing is, though, I can see things a bit more clearly now, and I'm not sure "Core" lives up to her title.

What I have found so far from her has mostly been focused around creativity, (usually feminine-leaning) gender presentation, and beauty. This is just a trend that I've found, recently, as we've been doing some writing on the side. I haven't asked her yet to write anything substantive. But it very much reminds me of when we were writing in high school and found that there was no substance behind our main female character, and that we couldn't write a female character at the time because we didn't know what a girl was.

Or, to make things more clear: we did not know what the inner experience of a girl or woman, was, and continued not to know until very recently when we were with some women in a gender-segregated group, and it was like, "WHOA, I do not belong here." So it's seeming like "Core" is a survival mechanism which has enabled us to "get by" in a society which expects us to be a woman by virtue of the way we look.

That being said, there seems to be some interest gathering around this concept of ethereality and being neither a man nor a woman, but having qualities of both. Could be called angelic, if it weren't for the fact that we place very little stock in Abrahamic religions. <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink --> It might be due to the buildup of near-surface past-life traits, causing us to envelop more of the spectrum than most. We don't know, exactly, the cause; but we know the effect.

And we do consider "Core" to be part of us as much as the more developed personality.

Most of the time, we're able to ignore the plurality, until we start looking intensely at our history, sense of self, and inner experience, and what to tell potential friends; and the pressure we've put on ourselves to present as either a man or a woman, which causes polarization. The polarization leads to time-based switching, which necessitates some sort of resource allocation system (time, money). Which is all, really, a pain in the butt.

As I said recently in a different thread: there are at least two of us here -- that we've been paying attention to -- and one of those two (the much more developed one) writes under three different variants of the same name. There are three different versions of him, but they're all him. We've basically stopped using the old names, as we haven't been writing in places where people would think there were more than one of us; and we've learned that sometimes there needs to be a system reset. The same identities often don't last over time, in my system; however, the energies that go into making up each identity, do endure -- just in different forms.

Said that to say that we've been integrating over the past year and generally are coming to better terms with the situation (emotionally), even though we have recently become aware of re-splitting (which is to be expected), and we have a...we seem to have a case of yin changing into yang. Which I'm not entirely certain I can explain in a small space. Yin is darkness and holds within itself the potentiality of light (or growth), while Yang is light and holds the potentiality of decay.

I need to read more on this...
2012-07-10 6:53
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Rain
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 289
Points: 1495.00
Contribution: tick tick 

Post: #8
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
If you think you're surprised returning a year after and finding an aged response, you should've seen my reaction after reading my reply. Felt like another person entirely.

It seems as though your path has taken you farther from the one I chose. It is vaguely fascinating to read of the troubles you are experiencing considering the number of similarities I feel we share, as it does not take a large stretch of the mind to imagine myself prey to the same had I chose similar. While I can't say that I am envious, exactly, there is a sense of longing for the theoretical outcome an incomplete merging would have brought me to.

~~~
2012-07-14 2:42
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Chordal
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 452
Points: 2662.00
Contribution: tick tick tick 

Post: #9
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
Hey all,

I don't have a lot of time to write here, but I've been thinking off on this tangent again recently...particularly where it comes to kind of having a *lack* of solid identity, as versus a solid identity as human or as anything else. If the word weren't so loaded, I would revert to calling this demonic, but that word causes me more trouble than it's worth, in my offline life.

Plus, I'm kind of currently distancing myself from Demonolatry and Satanism; if for no other reason, then to get a breather and reconsider whether it's really where I want to be (which it probably isn't). Like I've said, those two religious categories attract a lot of mentally unstable people, and so for that reason alone, I'm uncertain that I want to stay there. There's this, plus...some other things that maybe I shouldn't get into online, which relate to the use of certain terms for marketing purposes, which in turn draw the mentally unstable people. >_>;; Plus, the idea that it may not be as good of an idea to work with Demons as I had initially thought, judging from the experiences of (very different) others.

So...the place I'm at now is one where I'm still fundamentally questioning the idea of my spirit having a species. <!-- sSmile --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- sSmile --> It was brought to my attention recently that this could itself be indicative of a kintype, if I have no set form and can't easily relate to people who do. Arguing against this point, however:

For a while now I've been experiencing some odd visualizations, including a projection up and forward from where I sit at the computer (like a fanned cobra hood, minus the hissing), and intermittently, rays extending from my upper back, like fins -- with long trailing parts at the end farther from my shoulders. Whitish. Think "pointy butterfly" with the lower tips of the fins being extremely long and trailing, in a decorative way, but not drooping. (which would give some tie-in to the jewelry aspect [appearing bejeweled] and my being psychologically masculine and still wanting to look pretty? -- and (!) -- the sex-changing aspect that some female fishes go through when there are too few suitable males! [>_<;;] I totally did not even get that until now.)

I have no idea what this means, <!-- sSmile --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- sSmile --> though I also over the years, have off-and-on felt the posture of arching my arms out at my sides, fingers spread, like some kind of fish-puffery (think lionfish-in-display, and you're close). I have visualized myself as a sea serpent once upon a time, but since my earliest recollection of considering this was from an instance of viewing ReBoot, I've rarely thought of it seriously. <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink -->

It's possible that the projection from my upper body is just from being a bit large for this form...or it could be a consequence of my Rattlesnake juncture which has just sort of morphed into a more typical "venomous snake" juncture, which is just clashing with a "venomous fish" shape? (Venomous fish would also account for the beauty aspect, and for being free enough to appear both delicate and conspicuous, while retaining the potential for aggression.)

I should explain that ReBoot reference. <!-- sSmile --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- sSmile --> The episode I'm referencing is the one in which Dot and Bob turn into what appear to be undines...I'm not sure if this is the one where they meet AndrAIa or not...below the waist, they have very elongated, shark-shaped bodies (pointedly, the long sinuous body and long whip-tail is what I identify with). Above the waist, they're pretty much human-shaped, but altered in a way that I think Seraphyna (?) would appreciate -- looking visibly fishlike. I've never really felt anything human about this form...it's likely more of a fish or serpent, not a fish/human or serpent/human. No bend in the back to support an upright stance before the waist. Then again, I've never really seen (or explored) the upper part of the body, so I don't know what it looks, or feels, like.

Hm. That's odd, that I'd start to write about not having a form and then start to find one...one of my more successful pieces of art from a group is also of a diving dragon, which also has a very sinuous shape to it. Plus, I could add in all of the ocean- and water-based clarifying visions that I've had. Strong sense of smell, if I were related to a shark or predatory venomous fish, would also be possible, as well as eating things whole.

Huh. I guess that's a start?
2012-12-31 6:45
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Chordal
Member is Offline
Eager beaver
Kintype:
Otherkin:
Gender:
Reputation: 0
Posts: 452
Points: 2662.00
Contribution: tick tick tick 

Post: #10
Re: so...I guess I am otherkin...
Chordal Wrote:I have visualized myself as a sea serpent once upon a time, but since my earliest recollection of considering this was from an instance of viewing ReBoot, I've rarely thought of it seriously. <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink --> [...]

I should explain that ReBoot reference. <!-- sSmile --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- sSmile -->

Okay, as embarrassing as this is, I've found a web page which relates the episode in question. *^_^* I think I remembered it differently than it actually looked on the show, though; from what I can tell, my recollection is more realistic and detailed. Because the web page is so poorly written and so lacking in detailed images of what I'm actually referencing, though, I think I'll just hold onto it for now. -_-;; If you look up "dot shark tail reboot" under Google Images (no quotes), there are some pics there (the two characters are the CG merfolk) -- but from sources which I wouldn't want my computer connecting to.

Maybe one day I'll upload my drawings to a server so I can actually share them online...
2012-12-31 23:55
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Post Reply 


Forum Jump:


User(s) browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)