Trapped...(CAution: Rant)
So, I'm here back in NY, where I grew up. Spent 20 years with my family, and went to Ohio on a trip to visit friends of mine.
I'm back in NY now, to visit my parents for Mother's day and my mom's birthday, and feel like such a burden...
I've been nothing but b*tchy. Why? Well, to start off...my parents suffocated me my 20 years here. Mainly my mom's fault. I won't go into it too much, but when I moved to Ohio in with my friends, I got a taste of freedom...
And a couple weeks ago I brought up to my mom "Well, why don't I come back down here for a week in May for mother's day?" She was thrilled with the idea. I've only been here for 2 hours, and already I feel like screaming out in angst.
Maybe it's silly, and I don't doubt that it is, very silly, but now that I've had a taste of freedom, being back here makes me feel as if I've been thrown into a cage and am clawing to try and get out. My mom was following me around the pet store today and it's like, "Freakin' hell, get OFF my back! x_X"
I don't know.. I'm sorry to be ranting, I truly am. And then I come back.. to find out my cat is about 10x more obese than she was when I left. Don't get me wrong..I know it's bad for her health, I KNOW. But she was only slightly overweight when I left, and now? Oh god.. she's so bad.... And that set me off, I turned around and immediately started b*tching at my mom.
On MOther's Day. I feel terrible lashing out on this day. But it's just... getting that freedom, and coming back to this house, feeling suffocated and trapped...and coming back to find out the cat is in deplorable condition...
I was petting her and a CLUMP of her fur came off!
And when I told my mom I was going to take her back with me t Ohio regardless of what she said, my mom was like, "Oh really? I don't think so." And got all pissy and defensive. And it's like..well you know, obviously I can't trust you withf eeding her and getting her healthy.
..am I making too big a deal out of this? I'm due to go back to Ohio in 10 days, but the opportunity is open for 3-4. I don't think I'll make it through 10 days.
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