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Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
Meirya
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Post: #1
Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
For those of you who've been around for a while...

What do you know now that you wish you'd known when you were new to the otherkin community and/or the concept of otherkin?

Alternatively, what are some of the most important things you've learned about being otherkin?

What were some of the most helpful things that people (or articles, or forum posts) did tell you about otherkin (and therianthropy too, for all of this; I'm using otherkin as a blanket term)?

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2013-05-25 2:53
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Meirya
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Post: #2
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
Basically, if I could go back in time and give myself advice, it'd be stuff like...

- Don't worry so much about whether it's "real" or not. Are you having experiences? Are they meaningful? Is the identity meaningful and useful? Have you put thought and introspection into it? That matters more.

- Don't try to shoehorn your identity into something more "acceptable". Yes, engage in critical thinking, examine your reasoning, analyze your experiences... but don't just reject it because it's unusual. You're just going to make yourself miserable and confused by denying your experiences.

- Keep journaling. Keep writing down your journey and your thoughts. But also take the time to just experience. Analyze after the experiences, not during them.

- Make room for your otherness, make time and space for expressions of your animality in safe spaces (in your room, hiking, etc). It's easier to deal with if you don't deny it all the time.

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2013-05-25 3:20
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Seraphyna
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Post: #3
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
Hmm...

What do you know now that you wish you'd known when you were new to the otherkin community and/or the concept of otherkin?

There isn't really anything I wish I had known, but there are things (all pretty related) that I wish had been said more and should probably be said more to this day. Things like:

-"It's okay to be wrong."
-"It's okay to change your understanding of yourself in reasoning or kintype."
-"You don't have to completely fit a label to use it, you can make it your own."
-"It's your understanding of yourself that matters. They're your experiences." (That being said, rational thinking is your friend)
-"If you can't explain the reasoning behind why you believe something...then why do you believe it?"
-"No identity is invalid, only the reasoning and logic (or lack thereof) behind it."

Alternatively, what are some of the most important things you've learned about being otherkin?

Identities change, reasoning changes. Identity is fluid and our understanding of ourselves is constantly changing and evolving as we change and evolve.

What were some of the most helpful things that people (or articles, or forum posts) did tell you about otherkin (and therianthropy too, for all of this; I'm using otherkin as a blanket term)?

The most helpful thing has always been people poking at me and questioning me and really making me think about what I identify as and why. Lupa's "Field Guide" was also helpful in the sense that it made me realize that I'm not crazy or alone in my beliefs.

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"All that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost."-Tolkien
"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream."-Poe
2013-05-25 13:03
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Edge
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Post: #4
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
What do you know now that you wish you'd known when you were new to the otherkin community and/or the concept of otherkin?
-Don't try to force answers.
-Take what other people say with a huge grain of salt.
-Be skeptical, but not to the point of making myself miserable. Stop worrying.
-Don't tell anyone.

Alternatively, what are some of the most important things you've learned about being otherkin?
-How to balance skepticism with belief in the impossible and how to be contradictory.
-I really like me.
-How to deal with dysphoria.
-Stop worrying.

What were some of the most helpful things that people (or articles, or forum posts) did tell you about otherkin (and therianthropy too, for all of this; I'm using otherkin as a blanket term)?
-That I'm not the only one.

I'm the one with the power around here. -Rumplestiltskin
2013-05-26 5:48
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Annwyn
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Post: #5
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
What do you know now that you wish you'd known when you were new to the otherkin community and/or the concept of otherkin?

- That it's OK to be a polymorph. (I learned this from Seraphyna up above and it was the most valuable advice I was ever given)
- It's OK for you to think you're one thing, but to be another.
- It's OK to not know what you are.
- It's okay for multiplicity to be fluid.


Alternatively, what are some of the most important things you've learned about being otherkin?


As stated by a few people above, identities change and that's okay (good, even). Identities are fluid and change with the person's life and that it's expected and shouldn't be hated.

What were some of the most helpful things that people (or articles, or forum posts) did tell you about otherkin (and therianthropy too, for all of this; I'm using otherkin as a blanket term)?

The people that have helped me the most: Seraphyna, House of Chimeras, Savage (even if zie doesn't know that), Ilrak, and one other friend. Many others have helped me as well, but those are the four that really stood out and who I talked to who helped me come to terms with being a polymorph, with multiplicity [I doubt HoC knew how much reading their posts helped], etc.

There are probably other articles and posts as well, but I can't remember them all that well.

~ Arawn

Members: Gabriel, Lestat, Nico, Fenrir, and Nathaniel.
2013-05-27 0:17
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Edge
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Post: #6
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
Annwyn Wrote:What do you know now that you wish you'd known when you were new to the otherkin community and/or the concept of otherkin?
- That it's OK to be a polymorph. (I learned this from Seraphyna up above and it was the most valuable advice I was ever given)
- It's OK for you to think you're one thing, but to be another.
I still need to learn these. Also, I still need to learn that other people's opinions don't matter.

I'm the one with the power around here. -Rumplestiltskin
2013-05-27 2:42
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Chordal
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Post: #7
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
Meirya Wrote:For those of you who've been around for a while...

What do you know now that you wish you'd known when you were new to the otherkin community and/or the concept of otherkin?
- Don't assume that everyone knows what you're talking about.
- It's OK to step out of the line of fire, and to avoid saying that which is unnecessary to say.
- Follow your intuition, not popular culture.
- Question your assumptions.

Meirya Wrote:Alternatively, what are some of the most important things you've learned about being otherkin?
- Species is not integral to the essential form of spirit.

Meirya Wrote:What were some of the most helpful things that people (or articles, or forum posts) did tell you about otherkin (and therianthropy too, for all of this; I'm using otherkin as a blanket term)?

- Kahoku's postings were important to extricate the term "demon" from its (at times) Christian moorings.
- Angelkin are not always out to get me. <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink -->
- Experiencing unusual experiences does not equate to being crazy. <!-- s:mrgreen: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":mrgreen:" title="Mr. Green" /><!-- s:mrgreen: -->
2013-05-27 7:01
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Elinox
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Post: #8
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
Meirya Wrote:What do you know now that you wish you'd known when you were new to the otherkin community and/or the concept of otherkin?

1. That identifying as a wolf is often questioned more heavily than other theriotypes and that my thoughts/writings may not be taken as seriously due to the overabundance of wolf therians.
2. That there is never going to be a definitive answer on 'am I or aren't I?' otherkin. I had assumed early on in the communities that'd I'd reach a solid, unchanging answer at some point where I'd feel 99% confident in my 'kin identity. You're never sure and that's frustrating.
3. That there is never going to be any kind of general consensus on anything from the community as a whole: definitions, terminology, experience criteria, etc.

Meirya Wrote:Alternatively, what are some of the most important things you've learned about being otherkin?

1. That friends can be made, no matter the species identity (which was obviously a given).
2. That identity changes, much to my own frustrations to the contrary.
3. That everyone experiences their 'kin identity differently and each one is correct in their own right.

Meirya Wrote:What were some of the most helpful things that people (or articles, or forum posts) did tell you about otherkin (and therianthropy too, for all of this; I'm using otherkin as a blanket term)?

Sadly, no one has ever really told me anything important in regards to my 'kin identity, it's always been 'no one can tell you what you are'. So either I'm not sharing enough, everyone already thinks I'm full of shit, or else my beliefs are so rock solid no one feels the need to question them. <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink -->

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2013-05-28 20:20
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ZeroRei
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Post: #9
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
Not to bother with the elitist crowd.
2013-07-05 9:01
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Tzolkin
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Post: #10
Re: Things you wish you'd known as a newbie...
1) You don't have to be a known kintype. Approximation does not work.
2) Research, research, research.
3) Don't tip your hand. These experiences have a nasty habit of getting lost in translation.
4) Nothing is ever what it seems, and this is okay.
5) Embrace the mystery and let things unfold naturally. Forcing it will only slow things down further.
6) There is a pattern behind everything that happens. Watch carefully.
7) The truth of the universe is always much bigger than your worldview.

~Tzolkin
2014-07-14 16:27
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