Moving around the tree of life

Heeey. <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- s -->

I've been asleep most of the day; hope you don't mind me writing into the night. I'm not sure that what I'm thinking is necessarily...free of the energetic imprints of others, as I've been around a lot of people today. (Big reason why I was asleep.) But I've been having "embryo" M-shifts for a while now, and today had my first (accepted) experience of a prehensile tail, similar to (or modeled after) a monkey's. It spent most of its time curled around my left leg, but the feeling of settling into this form was not unpleasant.

For a while I've been thinking of a possible explanation for, at least, therianthropy. I understand that it isn't entirely worked out yet.

The idea is that when we experience ourselves as having different forms animalistically, we're in a sense psychiatrically or neurologically regressing up the evolutionary ladder to a mental state resembling that of a physiological ancestor of ours. This, at least, explains the embryo shifts I've had. In an embryonic state, it would be easier to imagine all possibilities for that form (including having a tail) as fully open, as versus specified -- which we seem to grow into. I was more uncertain that this was necessarily plausible, given that I don't know if any human ancestor has a prehensile tail, but then I did a small web search and recalled that we do have fused tailbones and some humans do have vestigial tails. In any case, a common ancestor between ourselves and primates with prehensile tails would indicate that there might exist in us, the genetic potential for such.

In short, maybe there are some remnants of instinct or body image which are passed down to us through our genetics, which we normally take for granted. But in some of us, we get experiences of body image which aren't what humans tend to expect from "humans," which (because we are human) may then seem to our human brains to require some form of explanation. Hence, otherkin and therian identity.

Right now I'm thinking of the image I got a long time ago when I was kind of wondering about that "bird/dinosaur" experience I had with the teal orb. What stands out to me is not the decoration of the form I experienced, but the feeling of being in the form -- hanging upside-down from a tree limb, grasping strongly, front arms seeming to be the only thing that mattered -- almost as if there were no rear limbs -- and a long, jointed tail. This was expressly a rainforest vision, and a warm one.

There's also the "tail-wagging" thing I've mentioned before, which might also make sense if we were bipedal and still had tails. It's possible that our tails would move from side to side to balance us while walking, as versus the arm-swinging which balances us in the absence of a tail.

Anyhow, I thought this was interesting enough to merit a post. I'm not sure why my mind has been on primates recently, except for the fact that I keep seeing cute photos of them online. Eh, well...

The problem I see with thinking 'kin experiences are defined by regressing up the evolutionary ladder is that not all of us have simian connections (other than being physically human) or even most of us as far as I've seen. In fact, I'm not sure I've ever heard of an ape or monkey therian at all (save for your phantom limbs experiences shared just now).

For myself, I don't feel connected to monkeys or apes at all. And to a lesser extend humans in general (American human societal customs often baffle me). That's because I don't see my identity as simian at all, save for my human meat suit; my identity is mostly canine. (I say mostly because I'm not really sure how fish perceive their identity.)

It's an interesting thought, but one that I would think only applies to ape/monkey therians or other 'kin types with simian-like attributes like a prehensile tail. Just my thoughts anyway. <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- s -->

I thought I'd add some thought to this thread, given that I think this is the only place I've mentioned the simian form before.

I've been a bit stressed recently and decided to attempt to undertake, in a couple of instances, drawing the monkeyish form which syncs up with me. I'm not sure if this is actually my form or if I just have a kind visitor, but in any case, I don't feel stressed or angry at all when I imagine myself like this. I know that I tend to sync up with "guides", human or not. This has happened recently, with a different form, but it was very clear that should I take that form to be "me," that the guide would pull back. This hasn't happened with the monkey.

There are a few things that stand out to me about this:

1) an erectile crest at the top of the head, with something longish (spikes? coarse hair? quills?) that can stand up when my attention is gained.
2) long, pointed ears which attach at the sides of the head, which can perk up and move around when I'm alert or socially signalling something.
3) long brown prehensile tail which spends most of its time coiled around my leg.
4) longer hands and feet which end in handlike appendages, usually folded when at rest (much like a dog's paws)
5) longer canine teeth
6) shorter legs, enabling 4-footed walking on the ground

There are also a few more interesting clues here:

7) when I used to draw people, I'd draw them with muzzles, and it took me a long time to train myself out of that. It looks perfect for this creature, though.
8) this would solve the rainforest/climbing visions, and possibly give clues to other ones.
9) when I do walk on hands and feet, I tend to curl my fingers under and walk on the butts of my palms to protect my fingertips. Where did I learn this?
10) I still cheep/squeak when agitated or excited...exactly how I've seen some (other) primates cheep.

I don't know if this really means anything, but I thought it was cute. <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- s --> I'm not up on having researched primates or primate ancestors, and if the rainforest visions are accurate at all, this means that there probably won't be much of a fossil record. I'm thinking a primate with pointed ears may be relatively easy to find, because I don't know of any primates with pointed ears; I just did a rudimentary Google Image search and didn't find much. It's also possible that this is just my brain looking for "pretty" things to make me, <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- s --> though the facial shape with two long ears and a central pointed crest is pretty identifiable.

I'm also fairly sure that this was a fruit-eating monkey, though I don't know how I got to that conclusion. <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- s --> This is mostly just stuff that I've pieced together, which just oddly made sense when I drew it out...