Kin Side?

As I've been around the otherkin community after my awakening - I often come across the concept of a duality - an 'otherkin' side of one's personality - and a 'human'. The thing is - I've never quite understood what this was, as I just am - there is no 'human'/'otherkin' split to who I am, and I was wondering if some one here who knows more of this personality 'division' -(b/c that's what it looks like to me, at least) could explain it to me.

Thanks <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_biggrin.gif" alt=":D" title="Very Happy" /><!-- s -->

There are three main reasons why someone might state that about 'sides'. The first and simplest is that they are a multiple thus have more than one 'part/self' and that not all of them are otherkin. The second is a bit more complicated and usually seen among therianthropes is that they do have a division between the 'animal other-self' and their 'human side'. So it's not that they aren't fully otherkin, but that they shift enough to be able to distinguish the differences in the 'sides', thus considering them sides of themselves. Thirdly is the hardest to explain fully as it is the category that I find myself in. By studying 'normal' (hate having to use that word) human psychology, sociology and behavior I am able to pick apart what traits/behavior/thought patterns are outside that scope, thus have the possibility of being 'other'. When referring to myself I am able to step outside myself and present the 'other side' though I do not consider it to be a split of any kind. It is just a way to explain certain aspects of myself, especially the otherkin portion so to speak, to people that wonder what the difference of it all really is.

Ghost Song

While I am but one being, I do have "sides". The way I see it is that lifetimes are like glasses tinted different colors for the soul. Thus, when the soul looks through the "human"-hued glasses, things look different than when using the "shinoar"-tinted ones. My mental shifts are pretty much putting on the other pair of glasses. Thus, things that I would have done as a shinoar, but are not "proper" for human lifetimes are attributed to that draconic 'side'.

I consider myself to have a "kin side" - my "wolf side" - although I believe my two sides are pretty well integrated!

But to me it's basically like - just one quck example - my "wolf side" that wants to be outdoors and playing with my dogs? I need to rein that in if I want to keep my 9 to 5 job <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- s -->

I think it could mean different things based on what way you look at it. For instance, for me it's kind of complicated because the duality is on multiple levels. Like, my human side is separate in one regard because I mental shift, sometimes very intensely. But in another way it is separate because I have the average human needs, plus the needs related to my kintype, which are not always harmonious. Still another way is that I consider my body to be a separate entity than me ( eg the soul ) with its own set of wants and needs, which ties into the concept I commented about just before it.

And that doesn't even get into the facets of the kinside. ( It occasionally shapeshifts, or at least the interpersonal facet does. Ghuh! See what I mean? @__@ )

For me, I distinguish my "human side" and my "kin side" as separate only about half of the time, since I don't really consider it a duality, but an internal-external kind of thing.

I'll always have my own inner nature, but, sometimes it's more masked-over by the little wants and needs and annoyances of the teenage girl I am at the moment. I refer to my kinside as my core self, that's still the same even though I'm experiencing humanity right now. Also, there are lots of things about my personality that have to be toned down when living life, because it just doesn't work here. Thus, there's a bit of a separation between me when I acting my body and me when I'm acting myself.

Kayako Wrote:Also, there are lots of things about my personality that have to be toned down when living life, because it just doesn't work here. Thus, there's a bit of a separation between me when I acting my body and me when I'm acting myself.

It took me a very long time to figure that out for myself. I didn't actually figure it out until a couple of months ago, and I'm eighteen -- but awakened to being "other", if not angelic, when I was eleven or twelve . . . so you're farther along than I was at your age, which is an excellent thing.

My most "natural" self is completely open and very intense; and I've had to learn the hard way that most people don't see it as "That's just who she is", but rather as "She's kind of out there." I've scared off more than one person because I hadn't learned to tone down my natural intensity.

I'm still learning to find a balance between being open -- and, in my view, "more honest" -- and being guarded; that is, learning when it's beneficial and/or appropriate to be more guarded, and when it's okay to be open. It's incredibly difficult, let me tell you!

I think a lot of the struggle for me comes from having come from a place where I didn't necessarily have to be guarded at all; folks just knew what kind of person I was and had no issue with it, though a lot of them were certainly pretty guarded themselves. At least in the very beginning -- for me, meaning before any sort of major conflict -- I remember a very free place, where it was okay and sometimes even expected for me to be completely open; and, of course, filled with passion . . . for Father, for Israfel, for my work, for my singing, for my friendships, for being. I'm still full of passion, of course, for a variety of different things. However, that passion for being -- or intensity, which is probably a better term for it -- doesn't exactly translate well in this realm.

But I am learning!

~ Ashaiel

I suppose that for one who is "several" having different "sides" would probably be more about having different "selves". I am only one and I can relate to what you mean. Not just Kin-wise, but everything wise: there's my pacifist side, my sarcastic side... it's a useful way of refering to different aspects of your personality that may, once in a while, contradict each other. What some people don't get is that it IS okay to be a contradiction.
And yes, I do feel like I have a "kin side". I sometimes refer to it as that; the side of me that feels certain pulls and certain needs, sometimes distinct from what my human side needs. Yes, we all have a human side -- at least even if it's just because we live in a human body and have certain needs. Even if your kin type doesn't feed or sleep, your human body does.

Shilo Wrote:As I've been around the otherkin community after my awakening - I often come across the concept of a duality - an 'otherkin' side of one's personality - and a 'human'. The thing is - I've never quite understood what this was, as I just am - there is no 'human'/'otherkin' split to who I am, and I was wondering if some one here who knows more of this personality 'division' -(b/c that's what it looks like to me, at least) could explain it to me.

Thanks <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_biggrin.gif" alt=":D" title="Very Happy" /><!-- s -->

I've known what I am for around five years and I STILL don't understand that whole "kinside" concept. There's no demon side and human side of my soul, it's just one singular "Micah Soul™" I guess.

I've heard it explained like "My kinside wants to go run through the forests right now, but my humanside knows it has to go to class." But to me that just sounds like "I WANT to go do this, but I know I have obligations and must go do this other thing." which is something that even non-kin experience.

I don't have "sides" either, per say.
Everything I am is "me".

An aggressive human being with no "kin" anything still has to control his/her aggression.
A transsexual still has to juggle the contradictions of flesh v.s. identity.