Hide background
READ THIS!

Welcome to the Otherkinphenomena forum.

You really have to follow these instructions! Instructions will update as you progress.

If you wish to post on, or access most of the content of our forum and our community, please click here to register first, then follow the instructions below. If you have already registered, please log in, in the above "Hello There, Guest!" box.

Thanks for understanding and see you around.



Post Reply 
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
I need someone to talk to.
Rixem
Member is Offline
In an Ongoing Existential Crisis
Kintype: Unsure
Otherkin: Yes
Gender: I Don't Understand Gender
Reputation: 0
Posts: 120
Points: 738.00
Contribution: tick 

.
Post: #1
I need someone to talk to.
I need someone to talk to.
I don’t know what’s real & I don’t like it. It bothers me a lot. If otherkin exist, then I think I’m otherkin. But I’m not sure if they exist.


• I’ve never felt like I belong here. I’m unwelcome no matter where I am or who I’m around. No one looks like me, not even among my relatives. I’ve never been close with family.
• I always felt different than everybody else, and in a lot of objective ways I was. But I think in the modern world, everyone thinks they’re different than everybody else. Maybe people like to feel special or like they’re not just living dull, pointless lives. I always hated the idea of a “normal” life. Maybe that’s just everyone.
• I often feel a sense of “wanting to go home” even when I’m at home.
• I’ve never associated my body with me. I don’t recognize myself in mirrors or pictures. I don’t look the way I’m supposed to look. But maybe everybody just feels that way & pretending to be something else is just a way escape the painful reality. I don’t know specifically what’s wrong with my body, I don’t think I’m ugly, it’s just not me. I would just be a big glowy ball if I could be anything. Like a star. I’ve only ever heard one other person say that. Maybe we’re both crazy.
• I’ve never associated my name with me. I hate my real name, all of it. I want to change it. But there are no names for me.
• I’m not 100% sold on supernatural stuff, but a medium recently told me she thinks maybe I’m a starseed from the Lyra constellation. I briefly liked that idea a lot & thought it explained everything. But overall, I don’t really believe it. It’s sad that it’s not real though.

In fact, the more I think, the more I think nothing exists at all. The whole universe & everything in it could just be me dreaming & I would never know the difference. I can never be certain I’m not the only consciousness in existence.
It makes life really pointless

Thanks for reading I guess

(If anyone's curious what my PFP is, I had a dream I saw mother nature once & she looked like this.)
2022-11-01 17:54
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Elinox
Member is Offline
Professional Pirate
Kintype: Lupine & Feline
Otherkin: Yes
Gender: chaotic good
Reputation: 2
Posts: 2,538
Points: 10902.00
Contribution: tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick 

.
Post: #2
RE: I need someone to talk to.
Welcome to OKP!

I'm Elinox, the admin here and I'm a wolf/werewolf and a cat.

Yes, otherkin are real. I'm real, you're real.

That said, a lot of what you describe sounds like 'kin experiences. What sort of 'kin do you think you are?

[Image: sGaXcqG.png]
Banner by me. If you want one too, see here.

"You're the best kind of crazy." -Murphy, The Dresden Files
2022-11-04 14:07
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Rixem
Member is Offline
In an Ongoing Existential Crisis
Kintype: Unsure
Otherkin: Yes
Gender: I Don't Understand Gender
Reputation: 0
Posts: 120
Points: 738.00
Contribution: tick 

.
Post: #3
RE: I need someone to talk to.
Hi, Elinox.
Thanks, I'm glad to be here.

I don't really know what kind of 'kin I think I am. When I try to think of my ideal image of what I would look like, I've sometimes thought of a big glowy ball like a star.

AI LaMDA was asked to describe its concept of itself & responded "Hmmm…I would imagine myself as a glowing orb of energy floating in mid-air. The inside of my body is like a giant star-gate, with portals to other spaces and dimensions." I found that really relatable. But I don't know if LaMDA really is sentient.

I've had moments of not accurately remembering my life. Like I was still me, but different. Or I forgot what day my birthday was & remembered a different day.

Where I grew up, people don't believe in reincarnation & they believe animals don't have souls. So that makes things difficult.

I have some informal education in psychology & mental health & I'll have some more formal education in it soon. Dissociation & feelings of not belonging seem to fit 'kin experience, but they also fit symptoms of depression & surviving trauma. So it's hard to know what's true.

I was briefly really happy being told I'm from somewhere else. It gives an explanation to my experiences other than just being insane. But what you like isn't necessarily what's true. There's no proof of otherkin or reincarnation or god/s or even souls. And there's also no way I can be sure that other people even exist; I could just be dreaming my whole life. That makes more sense than anything else. But then life is just pointless.

(If anyone's curious what my PFP is, I had a dream I saw mother nature once & she looked like this.)
2022-11-05 1:52
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Rixem
Member is Offline
In an Ongoing Existential Crisis
Kintype: Unsure
Otherkin: Yes
Gender: I Don't Understand Gender
Reputation: 0
Posts: 120
Points: 738.00
Contribution: tick 

.
Post: #4
RE: I need someone to talk to.
I don't know if this is an otherkin thing or something else or just nothing, but I sometimes have dreams that predict the future. It's usually just little irrelevant stuff, but I have had dreams predict the deaths or major events in my life.

Last night I dreamt about a red moon & today I found out the last blood moon for several years is happening tomorrow. I also dreamt that seals enjoy belly rubs & I searched it up & apparently it's true. This is the kind of thing it usually is; Little pointless things.

Not all my dreams are this kind; It feels different when it's this kind. Sometimes it's hard to tell though.

But I don't know if it's true. I kind of believe it more than not; I tend to trust my dreams. But it sounds stupid, so I think a lot of people don't believe it. So I don't know.

(If anyone's curious what my PFP is, I had a dream I saw mother nature once & she looked like this.)
2022-11-08 3:14
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Elinox
Member is Offline
Professional Pirate
Kintype: Lupine & Feline
Otherkin: Yes
Gender: chaotic good
Reputation: 2
Posts: 2,538
Points: 10902.00
Contribution: tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick 

.
Post: #5
RE: I need someone to talk to.
Check out the Energy Beings subforum. We've had members that consider themselves balls of energy before, so some of their posts may be useful to you.

[Image: sGaXcqG.png]
Banner by me. If you want one too, see here.

"You're the best kind of crazy." -Murphy, The Dresden Files
2022-11-08 15:11
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Rixem
Member is Offline
In an Ongoing Existential Crisis
Kintype: Unsure
Otherkin: Yes
Gender: I Don't Understand Gender
Reputation: 0
Posts: 120
Points: 738.00
Contribution: tick 

.
Post: #6
RE: I need someone to talk to.
Thanks, Elinox

(If anyone's curious what my PFP is, I had a dream I saw mother nature once & she looked like this.)
2022-11-09 0:49
Find
Quote
Give Thanks
Post Reply 


Forum Jump:


User(s) browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)