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Hello
Alusa
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Post: #1
Hello
Hehe guess I forgot to do my formal introduction and a few members have requested that I post one, so here it goes. My name is Amanda and I'm kinda new to the otherkin scene. I've been more of an observer and researcher for a while, keeping to myself over the period of the past few years and still figuring out who I am. I'm here because I want to learn and find out more about others in addition to myself. I've never been good with dreams, most things that I've remembered have been meditation following strange experiences or intuitive hunches, and sometimes I have memories/inklings of things that happened. A lot of my story probably sounds like some made up fairy tale, but I'm only going with what I've found to be true to me. I'm still open to the possibility that I'm wrong about any of this. I don't claim to know everything or have all the answers, only what I've found out about myself. I am a straightforward person and life openly. I'll be happy to answer any questions to the best of my ability, and I do like questions, they make me think and give me more things to search for. I am still always questioning myself.

To clarify what angel means to me, its simply a humanoid form, with wings, usually created being that is entrusted with the task of looking after something. I know thats kind of broad but I don't feel like arguing the point between what people think angels and celestials are, thats not important to me, and depending on who's asking someone might take it as either. I don't feel we served under the Christian God. My type started out as angels, but we had many forms. We were around shortly after "creation" and closely linked to it. We were strongly linked to karma, nature and the elements. For some reason our kind of angel was strongly linked/associated with stars. I don't remember all of our forms, I know we all had the angel in common but some of us had access to different forms. Other common forms were of sorta animal spirits and elementals. I had access to a phoenix form and thats the one I chose to spend most of my time in. It had the 7 rainbow colors and each color of its feathers had a different property, those I don't remember.

Our group had some sort of rank structure, I was the lead angel, there were also some people over us. I don't remember names. Back then we were peaceful and helped people, and didn't know much about fighting. I remember things used to be much different, more "perfect" there was no food chain, everything was self maintained, closed energy systems and didn't need to eat anything else to survive. It seems like at some time, from somewhere outside of our influence strange parasites came, it infected bossman and a few of the other angels, its like they had mind influence. Slowly they began to change, one day bossman asked us to do something horrible. He wanted things restructured, more like they were now everything eating everything else to survive. We were supposed to help look after things, not mess it up. We didn't want to introduce things like pain, suffering, death and disease. Asking such a thing was blasphemy, we refused. We were punished, our souls were fragmented, and the pieces had different curses placed upon them. I suspect a lot of this was to keep us weak, and from getting back together. Some of us saw what was happening before they were punished they fled to protect those of us who were hurt and now stuck in the new system of things. Curses were horrible, most of us were just made to forget or a good deal of our knowledge hidden from us. When we incarnated we would forget who we were, and there would be a fogginess inside if we tried to remember who we were, just out of reach, some would forget extra just from incarnating and remember as soon as they died. Others would remember who they were, they would be stuck in their animal spirit forms, some lost the ability to talk, and anytime they tried to use their influence to help others of us, it would always turn into something bad. Or, the worst most twisted of all... can you imagine being turned into a parasite stuck into the souls of your best friends for multiple incarnations being forced to eat/damage them to survive? A lot of the angels who fled, are kept busy, trying to lessen the effects of the negative influence this stuff brings up, trying to protect us.

I'll try to shorten this because you probably don't need my whole life story. I incarnated, remembered who I was and hated myself couldn't love myself, felt like it was somehow all my fault, I had a lot of personal issues. I went through some trama with the group I was incarnated in, I was killed and I reincarnated again as a Pleiadian, they are a human type race. Blonde hair fair skin, blue eyes. They are love and light, like the flower children of the universe, they are very open close to nature peaceful and believe in free will. When I was there I remembered for a short time who I was, I wanted a fresh start, it was so painful, I pushed everything into my subconscious and forgot, but I still had a lot of unresolved issues still there. I became a prominent military figure, and learned how to fight and I healed a great deal there.

I incarnated on Earth for my own reasons, and while down here certain things happened that were like memory triggers, and I started to remember who I was, gradually. Other things have happened, and now I just want to help the other angels pick up the pieces, collect their fragments and become unified again. I've also grown a lot, I can see how much of this was a hidden blessing. If everything is all "perfect" and theres no friction it stagnates and nothing grows, but pain and suffering can lead to growth. It took me forever to realize that and admit it to myself, because I felt like I had some personal vendetta that I had to fulfill.

None of us remember our original names, I remembered Alusa was one of the names I used in public though, so I like to use it as my online name. <!-- sSmile --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- sSmile -->
2008-07-30 22:21
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Archer
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Post: #2
Re: Hello
Hello, hello.

Your memories of "bossman" being infected with something from outside, which introduced suffering etc; which infected others of your people and caused them to have to damage and hurt each other to survive . . . that sounds rather reminiscent of the Vor'jen, an enmy that many Elenari elves seem to remember.

Ubi Dubium, Ibi Libertas

Quote:"I have suffered from being misunderstood, but I would have suffered a hell of a lot more if I had been understood."

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2008-07-30 22:27
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Alusa
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Post: #3
Re: Hello
This interests me greatly, do you have any links/resources you could list? I do feel I've had past life connections/alliances with elves. I don't know how and I'm still trying to figure that out. Also I do know some elves on the astral, creepy thing is they look like the ones in LoTR, but that was before I ever saw that movie. I wonder if the person who made it is an incarnated elf.
2008-07-30 22:49
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Post: #4
Re: Hello
<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://www.elenari.net/">http://www.elenari.net/</a><!-- m -->

Click on FAQs, and read up on Vor'jen and the Corruption.

I very much doubt that the makers of the LotR films were elves. More likely they chose to represent elves in a way that most people already thought of when the word "elf" is mentioned, and you saw elves that looked like them because you share those same expectations.

Ubi Dubium, Ibi Libertas

Quote:"I have suffered from being misunderstood, but I would have suffered a hell of a lot more if I had been understood."

[Image: neverforgetm.png]
2008-07-30 23:21
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Deros
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Post: #5
Re: Hello
Welcome to the site

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I would have learned a lot from life if I hadn't spent most of my time being educated.
2008-07-30 23:35
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Seraphyna
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Post: #6
Re: Hello
Welcome <!-- sSmile --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt=":)" title="Smile" /><!-- sSmile -->

[Image: seraphyna11_zps47e1e313.png]
"All that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost."-Tolkien
"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream."-Poe
2008-07-31 16:41
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RosaleenBan
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Post: #7
Re: Hello
Welcome!

Most of the LotR elves were based upon Norse myth. Tolkein was a genius at using ancient mythology in pure fantasy. You'll probably find better resources on that than I can give on the Elenari page, or other elf 'kin who know the history better.
2008-07-31 17:06
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chaitea
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Post: #8
Re: Hello
Salutations,

Alusa Wrote:I don't claim to know everything or have all the answers, only what I've found out about myself. I am a straightforward person and life openly. I'll be happy to answer any questions to the best of my ability, and I do like questions, they make me think and give me more things to search for. I am still always questioning myself.

I can totally relate to feeling that way. Glad to have you about.

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2008-08-01 4:48
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dazedwolf
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Post: #9
Re: Hello
Hallo Alusa!! I think I know you from IRC *smiles* Awoo!

Glad you found OKP - it is great!!

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That call me on and on across the universe
2008-08-01 6:54
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flarablaze
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Post: #10
Re: Hello
Welcome ^_^
2008-08-04 16:01
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