Ello there ^_^
So I guess I should give you guys a bit of my story. I've spent 23 years in this body. I'm quite an old soul though. I've always known I wasn't like most. I've never felt quite human. Often I find humans in general very confusing. For years, I've been saying that I feel like I'm in a foreign country where I don't quite speak the language or know the traditions. I started learning more about Otherkin in general about 6 years ago through a man I was dating. He didn't tell me a lot, but what he did just clicked. I started to think maybe I wasn't just "weird" after all. Maybe there was more to what I was and what I experienced.
As far back as I can remember I've been "sensitive". I've seen spirits all around me and heard voices. Of course growing up in a Christian household, I was always told it was God and I was seeing my guardian angel. I kept most of my experiences to myself. I also had a lot of intense dreams that I now believe are from past lives. I'm an empath. I believe this is definitely a reason why I have social anxiety. I'm mildly psychic. It's not something I can really focus on. I have a lot of dreams of minor things before they happen, mostly connected to people (running into an old friend, having a fight with someone, being betrayed). I also tend to read people's thoughts without even realizing it. I often say the same thing at the same time as other people. Like I said, I can't really do it on command. I won't say I get easily attached to people, I really don't. But on the occasion I do, it seems to be extremely intense. There is not one person I have every truly loved that I just stopped loving. And it feels like a curse. When I become attached, I become very protective and I will go to great lengths to make them happy and keep them safe. I'm endless fountain of love and caring. I don't know how to make it stop even when I should. I've had my heart broke so many times because of this. I'm also a nurturer. Kids and animals are drawn to me and I'm very much the "mommy" type. I'm most definitely not a fighter by nature. I will only use it as a last resort to protect the ones I love. I will however kick ass if need be lol. I love peace and honesty. I hate drama in my life. I avoid confrontation. One thing I never realized about myself, but everyone else seems to, is that I'm a healer. I've been told this by fellow Otherkin as well by just people who know me. It's an odd thought to me because my thoughts were of doctors and nurses and honestly, I can never see myself doing something like that. But as my ex fiance helped me realize, I have a gift for comforting others, helping to heal mental anguish and some physical as well.
As far as my Otherkin type, I believe I'm Celestial/Angelic. This is from what I've learned on my own, remembered from past lives, and what others have senses in me. I've also been told I probably have some fae blood so that's something I'd like to explore. If anyone has any feelings/memories/ideas about what I may be, feel free to message me. Sometimes I think even random strangers can see things in us that we may not see in ourselves.
As far as religion/spirituality, I stopped going to the pentecostal Christian church I was raised in when I was about 11 years old because I didn't agree with all of the teachings. Also, I felt they judged me too much based on my personal style. I definitely believed in a God and was very spiritual but I felt like church was stifling that in me, instead of connecting me to it. As of now, I really can't put a label on my beliefs. I still have some Christian roots and I also connect with Buddhism but if anything, I would say I'm Pagan.
I'm so grateful to have stumbled upon this site and I hope to learn more about myself and others by being here.
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