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Different personalities with different kintypes?
Nova
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Post: #1
Different personalities with different kintypes?
((Copy-pasted from otherkin alliance.))

Alright, I'm not completely certain on how to explain all of this, really, but I will try my hardest.

So due to past abuse I have undergone personality changes throughout my lifetime. Not simply minor changes that are common, but a full personality shift into a completely new personality. These changes are sudden and harsh.

This happened within the last year or so, the personality that used to be active on this site is gone altogether, with me instead. It's the same, but not the same person.

Now I've been struggling not with the personality change, but rather with the identification of otherkin. The last personality identified as an angelkin and had memories from an angelic life. I don't. I don't identify with it and I don't have any of those memories the other one had - which is not uncommon as I lose a good portion of memories from our (our being the different personalities, not different entities) current life anyway.

I've been trying to ignore it, really, but these last few months it's really been bothering me, as I've been feeling a very strong attachment to fae, and even identify as one - although not "officially," as I've been trying to ignore it and not think on it at all. However it's finally bothered me to the point of driving me up the wall because I, in part, want to be able to identify with what I am, but I keep trying to remind myself that the last personality identified as an angelkin and it doesn't really make sense how one personality can identify as one thing, but a different personality identify with something different since it's all the same Soul.

What I'm really looking for is knowledgeable opinions on this. Can different personalities be different kintypes? Or am I just more loony than originally known? If it's possible, why? It doesn't make sense to me.
Someone on a chat mentioned that it's possible that I'm sharded, also. Does that seem plausible? What does that mean, in greater detail?
2012-11-14 22:53
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Chordal
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Post: #2
Re: Different personalities with different kintypes?
Hi,

I'm just checking in here with some thoughts...like I told a friend of mine, I'll be around, listening, but I may not be able to give as full time to non-work things as I'd like. Right now I'm indulging myself. <!-- sTongue --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_razz.gif" alt=":P" title="Razz" /><!-- sTongue -->

One thing I'll mention is that plurality doesn't all the time have to be one soul branching out into different "personalities," as you put it. In the past I've definitely identified as plural, but I also have had a component going on where I wasn't all the time certain that everything going through my mind was internally generated. It *might* (key word: might) help to step back from what's going on a little bit.

It isn't necessarily the case that everything that one experiences, psychologically, comes from "within". I put "within" in quotation marks because I operate on the belief that each of us contains the All permeating us, within us and outside us, ever-present; so given that, it would be "natural" to experience oneself as not the same being, all the time. Given that, it is also possible that we each are made of the same "stuff" when it comes to beings which we can be reasonably certain exist (like other people, plants, animals, stones, etc -- things represented by material forms). This means in short that who we are individually, as individual selves experiencing ourselves through one brain or mind (at least so far as that mind can see it) can be as different as those who are exterior to this body, even as we listen in on the record of one brain or mind.

Basically, this blurs the line between external spirit and internal sense of self, but it's what a person goes through when they're...for some reason or another, mediumistic.

Another point is that I have a very good sense that not everything experienced by the brain is necessarily true. In my case, I have enough doubt towards recovered memories that I don't place too much weight on them when it comes to my own identity. That doesn't mean that I don't have a sense of the past, but it's extremely fragmentary and diverse in nature, meaning that I'm not really narrowing it down to see what was "really" my past life, given that I may have been on this planet for a very, very long time, in many different forms. (no, I did not see _Cloud Atlas_) <!-- sTongue --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_razz.gif" alt=":P" title="Razz" /><!-- sTongue -->

What I've found, in my years of being here (the number and placement of these years being uncertain at the moment), is that identity isn't really something one can change. This body has experienced an identity of being slightly-masculine-of-neutral for years and years, and even though that's a slightly different problem (being apparently biological in nature), there's no real escaping it. It can be ignored, but it will not go away. It can be fought, but no long-term personally beneficial consequences come of that.

A shorter, more logical <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt=";)" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink --> answer to your question is that yes -- even if we consider a plural person who has one identity who is human and one identity who is not, that's still two different ways of being in the same body. By the same token, there can be more than one "self" in a body who identifies as nonhuman, even if the ways of being are distinct from each other.

As for what being "sharded" means, unfortunately I don't know.
2012-11-15 0:42
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thetwins
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Post: #3
Re: Different personalities with different kintypes?
To me it would seem like you are trying to hold onto a label by which to define yourself because you expect it to apply. Which is not usually in the best interest of your own self, certainly not if you try to force yourself into that pigeon hole. As far as different personalities being different kin-types. I am one thing, but nobody else in the collective that is us lays claim to the same kin-type. Which may or may not help you as we also don't view ourselves as being all the same soul.
But to return to the previous part I have just one question for you. You said that you feel you should be angel-kin because the personality before you was one, do you know if the personality before that one also identified the same way? If there was a personality before that one to identify one way or the other.

Jack

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2012-11-15 4:48
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Nova
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Post: #4
Re: Different personalities with different kintypes?
thetwins Wrote:But to return to the previous part I have just one question for you. You said that you feel you should be angel-kin because the personality before you was one, do you know if the personality before that one also identified the same way? If there was a personality before that one to identify one way or the other.

Jack
Actually, that's a really good question that I myself hadn't even thought about, and I appreciate you bringing it to the forefront of my attention.

Prior to the last personality there were actually two personalities. One of which did identify as angel-kin, but not deeply. The other one, though, was extremely feral and identified as a feline. I don't know if she would have identified as a therian because she was feral pretty much at all times, but there were external reasons for that.
2012-11-15 7:35
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