An introduction

I've read the rules and there's one asking that we introduce ourselves after joining the forums. I didn't find any particular thread for that, where everyone could do so, so I'm creating one for myself. I hope it's ok.

First of all I thought I should say... I'm Brazilian so english is not my first language. So, forgive me if sometimes I do not express myself well.

I'm here because someone told me about this site when I mentioned something about missing and longing for a home among nature creatures and spirits in a distant past. I didn't know there was a name - Otherkin - for people who had similar feelings to mine. I'm still trying to get used to the idea of discussing it openly. I often avoid talking about that because I feel that people will understand it superficially, or think I'm roleplaying, or am some kind of "wannabe", have a large ego etc. But, actually, this is something I treasure too deep, as I feel it like being my inner self and I really feel the truth in it.

Well, let me actually introduce myself: I'm Caroline, but you can call me Carol. I'm AKA Aeryael out there in the internet. I'm a 22 years old Brazilian girl. My biggest passions are drawing & painting, writing, nature, animals, music (singing), and daydreaming.
Well. As I can remember, I've felt different since I was little. I was always the one that didn't understand the human ways quitely - and it lasts until today, when I'll look at everyone living their lives and I think "how they do that?". How they go out, socialize, study, work, date, deal with banks, money, dress up to parties. Hahah. Maybe it sounds funny but I never understood any of that too much. It's all so different from what I would expect of a "life".
My main childhood playings were about being an animal, a mermaid, or a fairy, and many times it included a "imprisoned" situation. I was always a melancholic, lonely and observative type. I also was SURE I could fly, if I just remembered how. I used to actually practice, running with arms wide open and then jumping as high as I could, then falling on the ground a little frustrated, but thinking, "that was close!". I *really* believed it was just a question of practicing and remembering how to do it. I don't know at what point I stopped trying...

I've always had pretty intense dreams. I used to have a lot of terrible, gory nightmares during childhood, but today it is rare. I also have beautiful dreams, and the best ones are the ones I really feel who I am, and I am a Fae at them. Usually I fly around, am mischievous, have fun and feel free like never, I have this deep feeling of freedom and joy and curiosity, and connection to the nature. I could describe some beautiful dreams sometime, they are usually pretty detailed.

There is something I always try to figure out, that is, how do my "Fae self" look like. I'm pretty sure I have wings. (I was fascinated with insect-like fairy wings when a child, they gave me a indescritible feeling I can only taste a little now). I feel a blue glowing. I am not the stunning "angelical" beauty sometimes people depict fairies like. I am pretty wild and sometimes will really behave like a wild animal. I bare teeth when angry. I like to defy and provoke and live adventures, not following rules. (so I'm not much into the "Fae politics", hahah)

Well. I think maybe it was a little beyond a simple introduction, I got a little excited I guess. I should be sleeping right now. (I hate the "should" sentences... like, obligations, lol. I used to really cease the night and feel closer to the Fae then, feeling full of creativity. Now I'm a little too much into the "adult world". Not by my own decisions of course and I do not plan to stay here too long).

I'm sorry if this is a very long message or if it's placed wrongly. I didn't read all other threads still, but I'd love to know everyone better.
Good night.

We have a subforum for introductions. Moved topic.

Welcome to Otherkin Phenomena.



- Blake

Hello and welcome to OKP!

Yo and welcome.

Oh! I'm sorry I posted it in the wrong place. I had a feeling I was doing that hahah, I thought there should be an introduction topic in the Fae subforum and since I didn't find it... well. Thanks for moving it to its right place. =) And thanks for the welcome messages.

Welcome to the site, Aeryael

You write better english than most people I know who were raised only in that language (including myself). So no worries!

Welcome to the site!

I know exactly how you feel when you say it is strange discussing your experiences openly. I'm also a night-hawk by nature but the adult world has made me stay awake in the daytime, heh.

Do you have a link to any of your art?

Hahaha, good to know that, WhiteFox, thanks!!

Thank you Archer! Yeah... my mother says that since when she was pregnant with me, I was awake and kicking all night and was very quiet during the day. <!-- s --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_biggrin.gif" alt=":D" title="Very Happy" /><!-- s -->
I'm still feeling slightly unconfortable with the thought of "exposing myself" and, dunno, being judged, lol, but it's just some kind of paranoia I have.

Well, I do have a gallery at deviantArt, here's the link - <!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://aeryael.deviantart.com">http://aeryael.deviantart.com</a><!-- m -->

Your work is totally outstanding. If you do commissions I think I will ask you for one in the near future . . . not right now though, cash is very tight for the next few weeks!

I find it interesting that while you're from Brazil, you feel a connection with myths from the British Isles. Do you think there's any particular reason for that, as opposed to you identifying with some myths or creatures that are more "local" to you?